compiled and translated to HTML by Jeff Schell - Last Update 11/05/95

ANYONE 'N EVERYONE

• Someone has a bad feeling about this
• It's their only hope
• Somebody gets choked
• A woman other than Leia is on screen
• An old Jedi starts to ramble about the Force (Vader counts)
• Somebody's hand gets cut off
• A gigantic technological marvel explodes in a single blast
• There is a tremor in the Force
• It's not someone's fault
• One or more heroes are almost eaten by a Thing
• A Jedi is much more powerful than he looks
• Someone exclaims "No!"
• Someone does something apparently suicidal that turns out to be a good idea
  Twice if it's not Han
• Someone wears the same outfit in all three movies--it counts if they change at the end
• Someone is mind-controlled using the Force
• People kiss
• A good guy wears white or a bad guy wears black
  Twice if a bad guy wears white and a good guy wears black (for uniforms, only the first person on screen counts)
  Three times if someone hovering in between wears gray
• Every time you find yourself talking to the people on screen
• An elaborately made up alien has no lines
• Some ship crashes into something after being hit
• Someone has a light saber duel (includes just using light saber)
• An Ewok dies, and the camera lingers longer than it did when the Death Star exploded, killing billions of people (fourteen seconds, count 'em)
• Boba Fett talks
• An entire planet is described as having one climate

C-3P0

• C-3PO loses a body part
  Twice if he is completely dismembered
• C-3PO informs us of just how many forms of communication he's familiar with
• Nobody listens to C-3P0's advice
  Twice if he is giving the odds of survival

CHEWBACCA

• If Chewie actually sounds like he's using words, not just one long howl

DARTH VADER

• Vader runs into one of his kids and doesn't recognize them
  Twice if he tries to kill them
• Vader's suit gets more and more detailed in each movie

THE EMPEROR

• The Emperor cackles evilly
• The Emperor has foreseen something

THE EMPIRE

• Tarkin brags about the Death Star
• Any officer speaks with a British Accent
• Any Imperial Ship is destroyed
• A TIE fighter explodes for no reason
• An imperial bureaucrat says something disparaging or elitist (i.e. "rebel scum", "insignificant rebellion", etc.)

HAN SOLO

• Han brags about the Millennium Falcon
• Anybody insults the Millennium Falcon
  Twice if it is Leia
• Something doesn't work on the Falcon
  Twice if it's the hyperdrive
• Someone or something tries to get money from Han

LEIA

• Leia insults somebody
• Leia wears an outfit that covers everything except her face and hands
  Twice if it covers her neck
  Three times if she's almost totally nude

LUKE

• It is Luke's destiny
• Luke whines
• Luke discovers a long-lost relative
• Luke fights monsters or savages
• Luke does some nifty acrobatic flip
• Luke teeters on the brink of a chasm
• Luke is upside-down
• Luke and Lando are in the same place at the same time
  Twice if they speak to each other
• Luke's parentage is Foreshadowed
• Luke refuses to take someone's advice
• Luke yells "Artooooo!"
• Luke is confused / taken aback

OBI-WAN KENOBI

• Obi-Wan Kenobi materializes for a guest appearance
• Obi-Wan Kenobi plays detective ("...Only imperial stormtroopers are so precise")

R2-D2

• R2-D2 gets thrashed
• R2-D2 plugs into the wrong socket and his head spins around

REBEL PILOTS

• A Rebel pilot is of a race other than white
  Twice if they're non human (co-pilots count)
• A Rebel Pilot says "Nice Shot..."
• A Rebel Pilot says "I've been hit..."
• Wedge (the only Rebel pilot competent enough to make it through all 3 movies- besides the main characters) makes an appearance
  Twice if he speaks

STORMTROOPERS

• Stormtroopers shoot everywhere but where they're aiming
• Stormtrooper armor proves useless

YODA

• Yoda uses bad grammar
• Yoda talks like a fortune cookie

Jeff T. Schell
email -- schell@u.washington.edu
web -- http://weber.u.washington.edu/~schell

Editor's Note: I had to substantially reformat this HTML for the modern world, as it was originally done in about 1995. I also made numerous other edits. Also, note that this game was created before the release of episodes I-III. For those movies, I suggest the following game: drink until the movie is good. Note that I take no responsibility if this places you in the hospital, grave, or other such suboptimal location.