Editor's note: See the bottom of this page for an explanation of why I include this supposedly sacred game.
From: MLaF23@aol.com To: email@example.com Subject: Drinking game
Maybe you've got this one but I didn't see it in the list. Maybe it's under another name. Anyways...
The game is Cardinal. It's not really a game. Just a way to fuck the newbie. Lots of fun! You get a tall cup. Like the ones from McDonald's (Super Size). Fill it with beer and give it to the victim. He must sit in a chair and go through the steps to become a "cardinal". You only tell him the rules once. He first must say "Oh cardinal, Oh cardinal, may I drink for the first time tonight." You respond "Yes my son, you may."
He then must tap one finger of each hand on the table once, and stomp each foot once. Then he must raise his cup in toast once. He then drinks what he thinks is enough. The beer has to last through four times of this. If he drinks too much or too little he has to finish it and start over. You keep going changing first to second to third to fourth. Four taps, four stomps, etc... If he fucks up....Finish it and start over. I've seen many, many seasoned drinkers drop after finishing this one!
If you pass you get bragging rights and get to do it to other non-cardinals. Lots of fun. Hope you enjoy!
From: Zeth Weissman
To: "'firstname.lastname@example.org'" Subject: Cardinal Date: Thu, 22 Oct 1998 11:59:27 -0400
Editor's Note: This person talks about how you shouldn't tell people the rules, and then they give additional rules. That's so very odd...
The rules to the cardinal game should never be posted in any games section. The privilege of becoming a cardinal can only be bestowed upon them by someone else that has already gained this privilege. Listing the game is ok, but there should be no description of how the game is played other thea that the person should find a cardinal.
Besides, like many drinking games there are many different variations. The one that you have on your page is quite different from the rules that I know. Other variations of the game include speed cardinal: Being able to perform the Cardinal ritual in under 30 seconds... I am still one second too slow for this title. And then group cardinal in which more than one person goes through the ritual at a time, one person messing up messes up the entire group. I Have done this with five people at once.
Editor's note: Here's another person who condemns the game's inclusion in one email, then sends me additional rules in another. Just goes to show, everyone wants to cash in.
Date: Sun, 17 Jan 1999 19:45:10 PST From: Richard Natarelli
To: email@example.com Subject: Cardinal
I must say that I'm upset about the lack of discipline that Mike LaFayette posesses. Look in any gamebook under Cardinal Puff.EVERY ONE says...."We can't really tell you anything about this game,find a Cardinal and you'll know why". He sounded like a little boy who watched and never succeeded but wanted everyone to think he was a Cardinal for bragging rights.Cardinalship is sacred...You bet your sweet ass I am.
Date: Sun, 17 Jan 1999 20:13:19 PST From: Richard Natarelli
To: firstname.lastname@example.org Subject: New Drinking Game...Pope
I don't believe you have this one in your plethora of games listed but I will send this one anyway.
The Game is called POPE. The same rules apply as those of Cardinal Puff (which shouldn't be listed anyway). Instead of starting with one large beer you use a 6 pack.All cans or bottles should be placed in 6 plastic cups and put into a pyramid type configuration.1 beer, 2beers, 3beers.Self explanatory. Starting with the top tier (1 beer)You give your 1st toast.Moving onto the second toast you move to the second tier (2 beers).And for the final toast the final tier (3 beers).THIS IS NOT FOR THE WEAK HEARTED.If Cardinal was listed as deadly then this is Suicide....I only know of one.Pope Tom Dever a Mic from Philly...God bless him...
Date: Mon, 29 Mar 1999 07:34:08 -0500 From: Jack Jones
To: email@example.com Subject: cardinal
Wow! We used to do this over 20 years ago (give me my cane, sonny!). We called it 'Cardinal Puff'. The rules look just about the same, only we dedicated the 'first drink of the evening to Cardinal Puff, the second drink, etc'. I know a guy who became the POPE (became a Cardinal, then went on to play the game with a full glass of whiskey). Not long after he passed out, we noticed he wasn't breathing, so we had to take him to the hospital.
I don't recommend anyone trying to become the Pope.
Date: Thu, 04 Mar 1999 15:55:55 -0800 From: "."
To: firstname.lastname@example.org Subject: New game.
You start off by getting into a circle, and picking someone to start with. They start off by saying "cardinal puff, then snap your fingers, stomp your feet, and take a drink, and tap your glass" The next person says cardinal puff, puff, snaps there fingers, stomps there feet take a drink, and they tap there glass twice.
So the point of the game is to increase everything you do, by one, each time it passes a person.
One cardinal puff one snap, one stomp, one drink, one tap. Next person, cardinal puff, puff, two snaps, two stomps, two sips, two taps.
Good, have fun.
In my defense
(Or, why I think this game should be published)
As you can see above, I get the occasional piece of mail that claims that this game should never be shown because it's a "priviledge". So basically, they're saying that a dumb drunken fratboy game that doubtless has caused hundreds to vomit all over their shiny new letter jackets is a holy thing. Well, perhaps to some pickeled mindset it is, but the internet is about an exchange of information, not about protecting our vaunted greek institutions.
I'm glad you have pride, folks; But perhaps you could apply it to something more deserving, like the last of the great american cars (back in the early seventies) or perhaps on your great knowledge of beer coasters. Maybe you'd like to brag about how quickly you can count backwards from 100 or better yet, recite the alphabet backwards to get out of a drunk test. But don't defend your childish institution so angrily, because I'll tell you what I tell every zealot, "Your dogma affects me not at all." You can carry your beliefs, but don't preach at me. You're wasting space in my mailbox.
On a final note, if you REALLY want me to take this down, I will require one Cardinal per fifty square miles of inhabited space in every nation of the world that currently has internet access; Give me their name, address, and telephone number. I will then replace this game with "I can't tell you what this means, but here's a list of people who can, in your local area." If you can't cover this, then the internet still owns you.
P.S.: BYT3 M3.